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hi my name is samantha.
i write a blog called bitchesgottaeat.
your mom loved my book meaty.
some dude named "dave" gave we are never meeting in real life two stars on goodreads and, okay, he had some valid points.

I HAVE ENOUGH HATE IN MY HEART TO START A CAR.

in 2008, i started a blog on myspace (do you even know what that is) to convince this hot dude to be my boyfriend. he eventually dumped me and that was pretty terrible, but now i have a book on the new york times bestseller list.
thank you, dude.